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The Dick Joke
High art... from a low place.

The Doctor Has News For You!

Created: 13 September 2017
Hits: 2637

Guy goes to his doctor for a checkup. After, they sit down in a private office to discuss the results. The doc starts with: "I have good news and I have bad news."

The guy says: "Give me the bad news doc." The doctor replies: "You've got cancer!"

The guy is shocked, but quickly asks: "So what's the good news?"

The doctor looks him in the eye and tells him: "I'm fucking the receptionist."

Not So Bon Vivant

Created: 10 September 2017
Hits: 3449

What do you call a guy who expects to get laid on the second date?

Slow.

Divide and Conquer

Created: 09 September 2017
Hits: 3634

1/3 of women not interested in sex. Me too. The 1/3 from the neck up...meh. From the tits down? I'm in.

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Don't Miss These Jokes!

On The Bus

A punk rocker type boards a bus. He's wearing a leather vest and pants, studded collar and cuffs, and he's sporting an 8" mohawk hairdo in a rainbow of colors.

An old guy just stares at him. Finally the punk looks over at the old guy and says: "What'sa matter old man. Didn't you ever do anything wild in your life?"

The old guy looks back and says: "Yeah... I fucked a parrot one time. Thought you might be my kid."

Never Mix Sex And Alcohol

I have a a real problem with sex and booze...

Every time I have sex, my girlfriend boos.

She Interrupted The Game

My wife popped in while I was watching the game and asked: "Want some supper?"

Without looking up I replied: "What are my choices?" She fired back: "Yes and no!"

And that's when the fight started...

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