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The Dick Joke
High art... from a low place.

Wrap it Up

Created: 31 January 2019
Hits: 2769

A lady goes into a sporting goods store and tells the salesman, "I need a present for my son's birthday."
The salesman suggests, "How about this skateboard?"
She asks, "How much?" He says, "Forty-nine ninety-five." She says, "Too much."
Then he suggests, "How about this baseball bat?" She asks, "How much?" He says, "Eight ninety-five."
She says, "Great, I'll take it."
He then asks, "You wanna ball for the bat?"
She says, "No ... but I'll blow you for the skateboard."

Yeah... It Was Her Fault

Created: 28 January 2019
Hits: 2940

A woman's in labor. She's got her feet up in the stirrups, screaming in pain and cursing her husband.

He turns and says, "Hey, don't blame me. I wanted to stick it in your ass, but you said, 'No, that'll hurt.' "

I Wanna Watch

Created: 05 December 2018
Hits: 7043

What's the difference between a pickpocket and a Peeping Tom? A pickpocket snatches watches.

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Don't Miss These Jokes!

Only The Best For My Princess

A father has three daughters who are all getting married on the same day.

He asks his oldest daughter, "Whom do you wish to marry?" She says, "Father, I wish to marry the man with three dragons on his chest."

He walks over to his second daughter and asks her the same question. She replies, "Father, I wish to marry the man with two dragons on his chest."

He then goes to his youngest daughter and asks her the same question. She replies, "I wish to marry the man with one draggin' on the floor!"

Never Mix Sex And Alcohol

I have a a real problem with sex and booze...

Every time I have sex, my girlfriend boos.

Wipe Nair On, Wipe Hair Off

How can you tell a sumo wrestler from a feminist?

A Sumo wrestler shaves his legs.

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