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WTF?!

WTF?!

Sometimes life can be stranger than even some of our very own dick jokes. And in times like that all we can say is: "What the fuck?!" All these stories are true... they happened to real people. And we didn't even change the names. They deserve the recognition!

Ohio Man Tried To Have Sex With A Red Van

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#WTF?! Just when you think you have seen it all, a guy allegedly tries to fornicate with a red van. One Tuesday evening, cops in Dayton, Ohio received a 911 call about a man "pulling his pants down and swinging on a stop sign," according to a Dayton Police Department report. Nothing like a big swingin' dick to make a cop's night!

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Montana man arrested after ‘liking’ his wanted poster on Facebook

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#WTF?! A Montana man was arrested after he “liked” his own wanted poster on a Facebook crimestopper page. This is of course another example of how effective the Crimestoppers Facebook page is in catching idiots.

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Don't Miss These Jokes!

They Don't Teach This In School

A guy goes to the supermarket and notices an attractive woman waving at him. She says hello. He’s rather taken aback because he can’t place where he knows her from. So he says, "Do you know me?" To which she replies, "I think you’re the father of one of my kids."

Now his mind travels back to the only time he had ever been unfaithful to his wife and he says, "My God, are you the stripper from my bachelor party that I made love to on the pool table with all my buddies watching while your partner whipped my butt with wet celery?"

She looks into his eyes and says calmly, "No, I’m your son’s teacher."

College Rules

On the first day of college, the dean addressed the students about the dormitory rules: "The women's dorm will be out-of-bounds for all male students, and the men's dorm will be off limits to all female students. Anybody caught breaking this rule will be fined $20 the first time. Anybody caught breaking this rule the second time will be fined $60. Being caught a third time will cost you $180. Are there any questions?"

One male student raised his hand and asked, "How much for a season pass?"

Everything Has A Purpose

My wife and I were talking anatomy. She asked if I agreed that the body is a wonderful, perfect machine. I told her a woman's body has one purpose. She asked what?

I told her life support for her pussy.

And that's when the fight started...