WTF?!

Sometimes life can be stranger than even some of our very own dick jokes. And in times like that all we can say is: "What the fuck?!" All these stories are true... they happened to real people. And we didn't even change the names. They deserve the recognition!

: Created: 06 May 2015; Hits: 2931

#WTF?! Woman steal bras... giving new meaning to hold up. Newly released surveillance video shows two women were behind the latest bra heist at a northeast Pennsylvania mall.

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You Get What You Pay For

A man goes to a $10 hooker and gets the crabs.

When he goes back to complain, the hooker laughs and says, "What do you expect for $10 -- lobster?"

Things Are Not Always What They Seem To Be

At the Senior Citizens' mixer, an elderly gentleman and an elderly lady struck up a conversation and discovered that they both loved to fish. Since both of them were widowed they decided to go fishing together the next day. The gentleman picked the lady up and they headed to the river to his fishing boat and started out on their adventure.

They were riding down the river when there was a fork in the river and the gentleman asks the lady, "Do you want to go up or down?" All of a sudden the lady stripped off her shirt and pants and made mad passionate love to the man right in the boat. When finished the man couldn't believe what had just happened, but he had just experienced the best sex that he'd had in years.

They fished for a while and then continued on down the river when soon they came upon another fork in the river. He asked the lady, "Do you want to go up or down?" There she went again, stripped off and made wild passionate love to him again. This really impressed the old gentleman so he asked her to go fishing again the next day.

She said yes and so here they were the next day, riding in the boat when they came upon the fork in the river and the gentleman asks, "Well, do you want to go up or down?" The woman replied, "Down." A little puzzled, the gentleman drove the boat down the river when he came upon another fork in the river and he asks the lady, "Do you want to go up or down?" She replied, "Up."

This really confused the gentleman so he asks, "What's the deal? Every time yesterday that I asked you if you wanted to go up or down you made mad passionate love to me. Now today, nothing." She replied, "Well, yesterday I didn't have my hearing aid in and I thought you said 'fuck or drown'!"

Lots Of Scarifies in Life

I told my wife I was so pleased she treated me like a God. She looked at me and asked, "What do you mean?"

I told her, "Every evening at dinner you give me a burnt offering."

And that's when the fight started...

WTF?!

Cameras Catch Brazen Bra Bandits Robbing Penn. Victoria's Secret

Man Named Bacon Arrested In Dispute Over Sausage

Don't Miss These Jokes!

You Get What You Pay For

Things Are Not Always What They Seem To Be

Lots Of Scarifies in Life