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Sometimes life can be stranger than even some of our very own dick jokes. And in times like that all we can say is: "What the fuck?!" All these stories are true... they happened to real people. And we didn't even change the names. They deserve the recognition!

Heinz apologizes after QR code on bottle took man to porn site

Created: 22 June 2015
Hits: 3106

WTF?! A German man who scanned the QR code on a bottle of ketchup said it took him to to a porn site. Perfect. Heinz... 57 varieties... now... 58. Our question is, where can we get a bottle of ketchup like this! The only thing edible at the local 24-hour video store is flavored lube!

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Florida Man Blames His Arrest On Faulty Legal Advice From Wikipedia

Created: 29 March 2017
Hits: 3063

WTF?! You have the right to look up idiot online, but that's all! Wikipedia is not Perry Mason. En route to jail following his arrest for driving with a suspended license and no insurance, a Florida man declared, “That’s the last time I listen to Wikipedia about driving. It said I would just get a ticket.” Actually that would be a dunce cap!

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Don't Miss These Jokes!

Who Knows What?

What do you get when you cross a whore with a systems engineer?

A fuckin know-it-all!

Open Wide

A guy walks into a bar with an alligator. It's about 10 feet long. The bartender flips out and says, "Hey buddy, you gotta get that son of a bitch outta here. It's going to bite one of my customers and I'm going to get sued." The guy says, "No no no, it's a tame alligator. I'll prove it to you."

He picks up the alligator and puts it on the bar. Then he unzips his pants, pulls out his package and sticks it in the alligator's mouth. The alligator just keeps his mouth open. After about 5 minutes, he pulls it out of the alligator's mouth and zips up his pants and says, "See, I told you it was a tame alligator. Anybody else want to try it?"

The drunk down at the end of the bar says, "Yeah, I'd like to try it but I don't think I can hold my mouth open that long!"

You Meet The Nicest People At A Bar

A guy walks up to a girl in a bar and says, "Hello. I think I'd like to get to know you better. I'm 48 years old, I've been a Congressman for 10 years and I'm honest."

The girl says, "Nice to meet you. I'm 30 years old. I've been a hooker for 15 years and I'm a virgin."

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