WTF?!

WTF?!

Sometimes life can be stranger than even some of our very own dick jokes. And in times like that all we can say is: "What the fuck?!" All these stories are true... they happened to real people. And we didn't even change the names. They deserve the recognition!

: Created: 18 August 2016; Hits: 2741

#WTF?! Just when you think you have seen it all, a guy allegedly tries to fornicate with a red van. One Tuesday evening, cops in Dayton, Ohio received a 911 call about a man "pulling his pants down and swinging on a stop sign," according to a Dayton Police Department report. Nothing like a big swingin' dick to make a cop's night!

: Created: 16 April 2015; Hits: 3132

#WTF?! A woman who thought she was pregnant has been left devastated after her 'baby bump' turned out to be an 11lb tumor.

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Don't Miss These Jokes!

Come Early For The Sale

Nacho comes before a judge. The judge asks: "Why're you here?" Nacho tells him: "I'm accused of starting my Xmas shopping early."

The judge says, "That's not a crime. How early did you start?"

Nacho says, "Before the store opened."

Switcheroo

A man went into a local bar and took a seat next to a pretty woman. He turned to her and said, "This is a special day, I’m celebrating." "What a coincidence," said the woman, "I’m celebrating, too". She clinked glasses with him and asked, "What are you celebrating?" "I’m a chicken farmer," he replied. "For years all my hens were infertile, but today they’re finally fertile." "What a coincidence" the woman said. "My husband and I have been trying to have a child for years. Today, my gynecologist told me I’m finally pregnant!" And she clinked glasses with the farmer again.

"By the way" she asked, "How did your chickens become fertile?" "I switched cocks," the farmer replied.

To which the woman smiled and said, "What a coincidence."

The Special Key

Three girls died and went before the pearly gates where St. Peter and his angel stopped them. St. Peter said: "Before entering heaven you must answer a simple question - have you been a good girl?"

The first girl replied: "Oh yes. I was a virgin before I got married and was still a virgin even after I got married." "Very good", said St.Peter, "Angel, give this girl... the golden key"

The second girl answered: "Oh, quite good. I was a virgin before I got married but not after." "Also very good", said St.Peter, "Angel, for this girl give her the silver key"

Finally St. Peter turns to the third girl and asks: "Have you been a good girl?" She answered: "Oh no, not at all. I practically screwed every guy I met, before, and after I got married. Anywhere, anytime, any position.

"Hmmm... I see", said St.Peter, "Angel, give this girl my room key!"