WTF?!

WTF?!

Sometimes life can be stranger than even some of our very own dick jokes. And in times like that all we can say is: "What the fuck?!" All these stories are true... they happened to real people. And we didn't even change the names. They deserve the recognition!

: Created: 09 May 2015; Hits: 3420

#WTF?! Did he keep pliers by the bed when he pulled out her teeth? Or is that what he calls his Johnson? A New Zealand man has been found guilty of six charges stemming from accusations he pulled out his lovers’ teeth with a pair of pliers during sex.

: Created: 28 March 2017; Hits: 2944

WTF?! A man booked into jail for public intoxication had a stolen gun hidden in a certain body cavity. Police noticed that the defendant was acting like an asshole and walking “strangely” upon arrival at the county jail. So they put two and two together and found the gun in cavity number 2,

Page 9 of 24

4
5
6
7
8
9
10
11
12
13

Don't Miss These Jokes!

On The Rag

What did one tampon say to the other?

Nothing. They were both stuck up bitches.

Going Downtown

When do you know you've been married too long?

The only reason you go down on it is because it doesn't talk back.

Black Listed

Three couples, one older, one middle-aged and one newlywed want to join a church club. So they go down to the church to meet with the pastor who is responsible for screening couples before they join. After the pastor tells them about all the benefits of joining, he explains that in order to qualify, they must refrain from having sex for one month. If they fail they would not be approved for membership. The three couples each agree and head on home.

A month later, the three couples return and and sit down again with the pastor. He asks the older couple if they had abstained from having sex. The older couple replied, "Oh yeah, no problem." and they are allowed to join.

Next the middle-aged couple were asked the same question and their reply was the same. So they too were approved for membership.

Finally the pastor asked the newlyweds the same question and the husband responded: "Well, it went great for a couple of weeks. But one day my wife was reaching for a can of corn on a shelf and she dropped it. When she bent over to pick it up, I was overcome with lust and I just couldn't stand it. That's when I said the hell with it and screwed her right there."

The pastor was shocked but said: "You realize that now you won't be allowed into the club."

The husband replied: "Oh that's okay, we're not allowed back into Safeway either!"