Just Plain Funny

PlainFunny400X200Not every laugh has to be a dick joke!

My wife is constantly complaining that I don't listen to her...

...or something like that.

A couple is in divorce court to decide on custody of their child. The judge asks each one to give a reason why they should be the one to keep the child.

The wife says, "Well I carried this child around in me for nine months and I had to go through a painful birth process. This is my child and a part of me." Then the judge turns to the husband and asks the same question.

The husband replies, "OK, I take a coin and put it in the drink machine and a drink comes out. Now, tell me, who does the drink belong to -- me or the machine"

Why is a woman like a car?

On a cold morning when you need it the most, she won't turn over.

You know old Dick tries to stay pretty busy. Last week I did a benefit for the "Tempura House"... that's a shelter for lightly battered women.