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Just Plain Funny

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The Story of My Love Life

Created: 17 July 2017
Hits: 2402

When I was 14, all I wanted was a girlfriend.

When I was 16, I got a girlfriend, but there was no passion. What I really wanted was a girl with a zest for life.

When I was 19, I found a passionate girl, but she was too emotional. So I looked for a girl with some stability.

When I was 25, I found a stable girl, but she was too boring. What i needed was a girl with some excitement.

When I was 28, I found an exciting girl, but she lacked direction and was too petty. I thought I'd be better off with a girl with some ambition.

When I was 31, I found an ambitious girl. Yeah... she was so ambitious that she married me, divorced me, and took everything I owned.

Now I am 40, and all I want is a girl with big tits!

For Those Too Young To Remember

Created: 14 July 2017
Hits: 2104

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks: "Why the long face?"

Wait For It

Created: 12 July 2017
Hits: 2060

Polar bear walks into a bar, asks for a gin...
.
.
.
.
.
and tonic.

Bartender asks: "Why the long pause?"

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Gotta Stay In Business

What do pimps and farmers have in common?

They both need a hoe to stay in business.

You Don't Scare Me

A lady's sick of her husband's drinking, so she decides to teach him a lesson. She dresses up like Satan, and when her husband walks in from being out all night, she jumps out from behind the sofa and screams.

The guy looks at her and says, "You don't scare me. I'm married to your sister."

Learn To Drive

Why are men like cars?

Because they always pull out before they check to see if anyone else is coming.

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