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Just Plain Funny

PlainFunny400X200Not every laugh has to be a dick joke!

Not Quite A Cure

Created: 25 August 2017
Hits: 2748

A doctor told his patient her test results came back and she had a rare disease with only 6 months to live.

"That's such a short amount of time." the woman begged, "Isn't there anything I can do?"

"Marry a lawyer," the doctor told her. "It will be the longest six months of your life."

First Door On The Left

Created: 23 August 2017
Hits: 2924

A dog walks into a bar and hops up on a stool. He looks the bartender in the eye and says, "Hey, guess what? I can talk. Have you ever seen a talking dog before? How about a drink?"

The bartender thinks for a moment and says, "Sure, the toilet's right around the corner."

Sign Of The Times

Created: 21 August 2017
Hits: 2709

2 reasons I know I'm getting old. My memory's not as sharp as it once was & my memory's not so good anymore.

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Don't Miss These Jokes!

Not Much To Do

A guy drives into a tiny southern town and parks in front of the one building in town that's marked General Store. He gets out and spots an old guy sitting and rocking on the porch. He says to the old guy, "What a God-forsaken place. What do you people do around here?"

The old guy says, "We don't do nothin' but hunt 'n fuck." The stranger asks, "What do you hunt?"

The old guy says, "Somethin' to fuck."

Peeing In The Shower Saves Water

My girlfriend's a real clean freak. She says it's disgusting to piss in the bathtub.

Next time maybe I should wait until she gets out.

No, Not That!

What gets longer when you pull it, fits between the breasts, inserts neatly in a hole, and works best when jerked?

A seat belt.

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