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What Rhymes With Hibernation?

Category: Dick Jokes
Published: 20 February 2015
Hits: 3044

It's the spring, and the baby bear comes out of his cave. His knees are wobbling, he's a wreck. He's skin and bones, with big circles under his eyes.

His mother says, "Junior! Did you hibernate all winter like you were supposed to?"

He says, "Hibernate? Shit! I thought you said masturbate!"

What An UGLY Baby!

Category: Dick Jokes
Published: 19 February 2015
Hits: 3579

What sexual position should a woman use to make an ugly kid?

Ask your Mom.

The Father, The Son, And ? ....

Category: Dick Jokes
Published: 18 February 2015
Hits: 2625

Little Johnny is walking along and a priest is coming the other way.
Johnny says, "Hey, mister, why are you wearin' your collar backwards?"
The priest says, "Because I'm a father."
Johnny says, "Yeah? Well, my old man's got three kids and he don't wear his collar backwards."
The priest says, "You don't understand, son. I have thousands of children."
Johnny says, "You should wear your fuckin' trousers backwards!"

A Woman's Place Is In The Kitchen

Category: Just Plain Funny
Published: 17 February 2015
Hits: 2911

Why do brides wear white?

The dishwasher should match the refrigerator and the stove.

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Don't Miss These Jokes!

Pinocchio's Complaint

Pinnochio tells his Dad that whenever he has sex with a girl, she complains about the splinters. His father gives him a piece of sand paper and tells him to rub his dick with it before sex and it should solve the problem.

A few days later, his father asks: "How are things going with the girls?" Pinocchio tells him: "Girls... who needs girls?"

Tell Me A Story

Daddy," a little girl asked her father, "do all fairy tales begin with 'Once upon a time'? "

"No, sweetheart," he answered. "Some begin with 'If I'm elected.'"

Not That Kind Of Sperm Bank

Sex is like a bank account.

First you put it in. Once you take it out you lose interest.

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