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What Rhymes With Hibernation?

Category: Dick Jokes
Published: 20 February 2015
Hits: 3101

It's the spring, and the baby bear comes out of his cave. His knees are wobbling, he's a wreck. He's skin and bones, with big circles under his eyes.

His mother says, "Junior! Did you hibernate all winter like you were supposed to?"

He says, "Hibernate? Shit! I thought you said masturbate!"

What An UGLY Baby!

Category: Dick Jokes
Published: 19 February 2015
Hits: 3626

What sexual position should a woman use to make an ugly kid?

Ask your Mom.

The Father, The Son, And ? ....

Category: Dick Jokes
Published: 18 February 2015
Hits: 2673

Little Johnny is walking along and a priest is coming the other way.
Johnny says, "Hey, mister, why are you wearin' your collar backwards?"
The priest says, "Because I'm a father."
Johnny says, "Yeah? Well, my old man's got three kids and he don't wear his collar backwards."
The priest says, "You don't understand, son. I have thousands of children."
Johnny says, "You should wear your fuckin' trousers backwards!"

A Woman's Place Is In The Kitchen

Category: Just Plain Funny
Published: 17 February 2015
Hits: 2966

Why do brides wear white?

The dishwasher should match the refrigerator and the stove.

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Don't Miss These Jokes!

Do What Mama Told You

Guy's making out with his girlfriend. Things start to get hot and heavy so he puts his hand under her skirt.

His girlfriend tells him: "You can't do that. My mother made me promise never to let a man put his hand under my skirt. But if you put your hand down my back, it'll be the second hole you come to."

Remember This Test From High School?

What'd the hockey player get on his SAT's?

Drool.

She's Smoking!

What do you do if your girlfriend starts smoking?

Slow down and use some lubricant.

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