D*ck Joke of the Day
A laugh a day. It's not hard. Seriously.
  • Home
  • Dick Jokes
  • Just Plain Funny
  • That's when the fight started
  • WTF?!
  • About
  • Send Dick A Joke

twitter facebook youtube 27330664 ml50x52

  1. You are here:  
  2. Home
  3. Every Frickin' Joke

Every Frickin' Joke

Picture Perfect

Category: And that's when the fight started...
Published: 16 February 2015
Hits: 2318

I thought I could please my wife by offering her a sumptuous breakfast in bed. So I asked her what would be her perfect breakfast.

She said: "My perfect breakfast would be a cup of gourmet coffee. Our son is on the cover of the Wheaties box. Our daughter is on the cover of Business Week. And your face is on the back of the milk carton."

And that's when the fight started...

I Hereby Sentence You

Category: And that's when the fight started...
Published: 15 February 2015
Hits: 2546

A husband gets home from his day in court on a traffic offense and his wife asks: "So, how did it go?"

The husband replies: "Well honey, I ended up in front of Judge Calloway, you remember, the judge who married us. Turns out he remembered me too... so I pleaded 'guilty with explanation' and he only gave me a small fine. That was way better than the last time, when you and I were in there together. That time he gave me life without the possibility of parole."

And that's when the fight started...

No Need To Call The Police

Category: Just Plain Funny
Published: 15 February 2015
Hits: 3195

It's Valentine's day! So ladies, don't you worry about getting me what you got me last year.

I have enough restraining orders already.

A Visit To My Local Sex Toys Shop

Category: Dick Jokes
Published: 15 February 2015
Hits: 2934

This year I bought some interesting gifts for my wife for Valentine's Day

I got her 2 sets of handcuffs, 4 pairs of crotchless panties, a giant butt plug, a 12 inch vibrator, a bondage whip, a naughty nurses outfit and 6 huge glow in the dark penis shaped helium balloons.

Will she be happy with it all? I don't know.

But what I do know is that on February 14th her grave will stand out more than any others in the cemetery!

Page 241 of 286

  • 236
  • 237
  • 238
  • 239
  • 240
  • 241
  • 242
  • 243
  • 244
  • 245

Don't Miss These Jokes!

Sometimes You Need A Break In The Action

Two Syrian hookers were talking about their problems. One said: "With the Russians jumping into this war we've got soldiers lined up around the block. I need a break!"

Her girlfriend agreed: "Yeah... I think we need to declare a no fly zone."

Going Down?

I think I got beat up pretty bad last night. I remember getting on the elevator at my office and running into this gorgeous secretary with big tits. I couldn't help staring at her while the elevator door closed, but didn't start up. She said: "Would you please press one?"

So I did. I don't remember much after that...

Eyeglass Problem Solved

What should you do if your sister-in-law sits on your glasses & breaks them?

Take them off next time.

Copyright © 2025 D*ck Joke Of The Day. All Rights Reserved.