Every Frickin' Joke

Single And Ready To Mingle

: Category: Just Plain Funny; Published: 15 February 2015; Hits: 2619

This is going to be the 1st Valentine's Day I was single in almost 10 years. I'm kind of excited...

I just hope the wife feels the same way when she finds out.

You, My One And Only

: Category: Just Plain Funny; Published: 14 February 2015; Hits: 3085

The day before Valentine's day I was looking for the perfect card for my wife when I saw something strange.

On the front of one of the cards it said, "I love you and only you."

By itself it may not sound strange, but this was a package of 20 cards.

Going Postal

: Category: Just Plain Funny; Published: 14 February 2015; Hits: 2997

My apartment is full of Valentine's cards.

I'm not some kind of stud.

I'm a lazy bastard postman.

Not That Kind Of Table

: Category: Just Plain Funny; Published: 14 February 2015; Hits: 2590

Just booked a table for me and the wife for Valentine's Day.

Hope the bitch knows how to play snooker.

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Thanksgiving Day Football

The pro football team had just finished their daily practice session when a large turkey came strutting onto the field. While the players gazed in amazement, the turkey walked up to the head coach and demanded a tryout.

Everyone stared in silence as the turkey caught pass after pass and ran right through the defensive line. When the turkey returned to the sidelines, the coach shouted, "You're terrific!!! Sign up for the season, and I'll see to it that you get a huge bonus."

"Forget the bonus," the turkey said, "All I want to know is, does the season go past Thanksgiving Day?"

All Sinners Must Come And Confess

What's the difference between sin and shame?

It's a sin to put it in, but it's a shame to pull it out.

The Latest Technology

I told my pal: "I got a brand new digital hearing aid, $10,000!" "What kind is it?" he asked.

"Six-thirty."