What's the difference between a pickpocket and a Peeping Tom? A pickpocket snatches watches.
My wife stripped naked last night and stood on her head. I asked: "What the hell are you doing?"
She said: "Well... if you can't get it up again tonight, I thought maybe you could just drop it in!"
And that's when the fight started...
What do a condom & a coffin have in common?
You cum in one, go in the other & they both contain stiffs.
We were getting ready in the bathroom together when my wife started putting her deodorant on. Thinking she was being cute she asked: "What's strong enough for a man but made for a woman?"
I told her: "The back of my hand."
