A laugh a day. It's not hard. Seriously.

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Dick Jokes

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The Dick Joke
High art... from a low place.

Doctor Patient Confidentiality

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A guy goes to see his doctor. In the exam room the doctor asks, "What brings you here today?" The guy says, "Before I show you, you have to promise not to laugh." The doctor nods, and the guys pulls down his pants and reveals an incredibly small penis.

Holding back laughter, the doctor manages to ask, "What exactly is the problem?"

The guy tells him, "Can't you see doc... it's swollen."

Good Reason To Join

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Who is the most popular guy at a nudist colony? The guy who can carry 2 cups of coffee and a dozen donuts.

Who is the most popular girl at a nudist colony? The girl who can eat the last donut.

Off-Label Usage

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Nursing homes now give Viagra to the old guys living there.

Keeps them from rolling out of bed.

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Next It'll Say: Out Of Business

When we first started dating I wanted to show my girfriend I was serious. So I changed my Facebook status to "in a relationship."

When I told her she said: "It should've been changd to 'under new management!'"

And that's when the fight started...

Knew It Wouldn't Work

My wife suggested we go to a marriage counselor to work on our relationship. I said sure. We get there and the therapist asks me to tell how I felt.

I said: "I knew right from the beginning our marriage wouldn't work. I'm an Aquarius and she's a cunt."

And that's when the fight started...

Like Father, Like Son

If my son farts or has his hands down his pants, my wife smiles and says, “Like father, like son!”

Yesterday we caught him screwing the neighbor, but for some reason it wasn’t so funny when I said it.