What Did Your Momma Give You?

Why are black guys dicks bigger than white guys?

Because as kids white guys had toys to play with!

My wife came in complaining about me never lifting a finger around the house.

So I did - the middle one.

And that's when the fight started...

My wife will buy anything marked down. Last year she bought an escalator.

(With thanks to the great Henny Youngman.)

What’s the difference between a Southern zoo and a Northern zoo?

They both have a description of the animal on the front of the cage. The Southern zoo includes a recipe.