Now THIS Is Doggie Style

What'd the Polish guy say when he came home and found his best friend on top of his wife?

Down, Fido, down boy!

Why did the snowman have a smile on his face?

Because the snowblower was coming down the block.

What is the difference between a phillip and a flathead?

Easy! I can't flathead her ass with my dick.

If you keep a baseball bat in your car, also keep a glove.

Your lawyer will thank you.