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The Dick Joke
High art... from a low place.

I Wanna Watch

Created: 05 December 2018
Hits: 6348

What's the difference between a pickpocket and a Peeping Tom? A pickpocket snatches watches.

The Doctor Has News For You!

Created: 13 September 2017
Hits: 1948

Guy goes to his doctor for a checkup. After, they sit down in a private office to discuss the results. The doc starts with: "I have good news and I have bad news."

The guy says: "Give me the bad news doc." The doctor replies: "You've got cancer!"

The guy is shocked, but quickly asks: "So what's the good news?"

The doctor looks him in the eye and tells him: "I'm fucking the receptionist."

Not So Bon Vivant

Created: 10 September 2017
Hits: 2745

What do you call a guy who expects to get laid on the second date?

Slow.

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Don't Miss These Jokes!

Ahh... The Good Old Days

Three old ladies were sitting side by side in their retirement home reminiscing.

The first lady recalled shopping at the grocer and demonstrated with her hands, the length and thickness of a cucumber she could buy for a penny.

The second old lady nodded, adding that onions used to be much bigger and cheaper back then, and demonstrated the size of two big onions she could buy for a penny a piece.

The third old lady remarked, "I can’t hear a word you’re saying, but I remember the guy you’re talking about."

Finished

Man is incomplete until he’s married.

Then he’s finished.

They're All Doin' It

Two rednecks are out fishing. The first one asks: "If I go to your house and fuck your wife and get her pregnant and she has a kid, would that make us kinfolk?"

The friend says: "Nope. That'd make us about even."

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