Dick Jokes

DJoke400X311

The Dick Joke
High art... from a low place.

What is the difference between ooooooh and aaaaaaah?

About three inches.

What species of bird is known to give the best head?

The swallow!

A guy and his date were parked on lovers lane at the top of a hill overlooking the city. Just as he made his move the gal stopped him and said: “I really should've told you this earlier, but I’m actually a hooker. If you want to get laid tonight it'll cost you 30 bucks.” Reluctantly the guy forked over the money, then screwed her in the back seat.

When they got back in front the guy just sat in the driver’s seat staring out the window. “Why aren’t we going anywhere?” the girl asked. “Well," the guy said, "I should've mentioned this before, but I’m actually a taxi driver... and the fare back to town is $35.00!”

Which is the odd one out a woman, a microwave or a freezer?

The microwave, the other two leak when they're fucked!