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Dick Jokes

DJoke400X311

The Dick Joke
High art... from a low place.

Now That'll Make Her Scream!

Hits: 3269

How do you make your wife scream for an hour after sex?

Wipe your dick on the curtains.

Gotta Stay In Business

Hits: 3391

What do pimps and farmers have in common?

They both need a hoe to stay in business.

Better To Keep Your Mouth Shut

Hits: 3729

One day two boys were walking through the woods when they came upon some rabbit shit. The first boy asked his friend: "What's that?"

"'They're smart pills," his friend told him. "Eat one and it'll make you smarter." So the boy popped one in his mouth and said: "Yech. This tastes like shit."

"See," said his friend, "you're getting smarter already."

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Don't Miss These Jokes!

She's Smoking!

What do you do if your girlfriend starts smoking?

Slow down and use some lubricant.

Are Those Brand New Hardwood Floors?

How are women like hardwood floors?

You lay them right the first time and you can walk all over them for the next 20 years.

Black Friday

A small business owner was dismayed when a brand new corporate chain much like his own opened up next door and erected a huge sign which read BEST BLACK FRIDAY DEALS.

He was horrified when another competitor opened up on his right, and announced its arrival with an even larger sign, reading LOWEST BLACK FRIDAY PRICES.

The small business owner panicked, until he got an idea.

He put the biggest sign of all over his own shop, it read: MAIN ENTRANCE.