A laugh a day. It's not hard. Seriously.

twitter facebook youtube 27330664 ml50x52

Dick Jokes

DJoke400X311

The Dick Joke
High art... from a low place.

How's Your Credit?

Hits: 4132

How is sex like credit?

It's the people who need it most who can't get any.

 

Who's That Lady...

Hits: 3251

What's the definition of a lady?

Someone who doesn't drink or smoke, and the only time she curses is when your dick slips out.

I'm A Barbie Girl, In A Barbie World...

Hits: 2982

Why can't Barbie get pregnant?

Because Ken comes in a different box.

Page 125 of 180

Don't Miss These Jokes!

Next It'll Say: Out Of Business

When we first started dating I wanted to show my girfriend I was serious. So I changed my Facebook status to "in a relationship."

When I told her she said: "It should've been changd to 'under new management!'"

And that's when the fight started...

How To Get Him In The Mood

For their 10th anniversary, a wife surprises her husband by wearing the lingerie she wore on their wedding night. She asks him what his exact thoughts were 10 years ago when he first saw her in the lingerie.

He tells her, "I wanted to suck your tits dry and fuck your brains out." "Well, what do you think today?" she asks,

He says, "Mission accomplished!"

And that's when the fight started...

We Love Our First Responders

A fire chief just got married. On their honeymoon he informed his new wife that their home would be run like a firehouse... they would have sex on the bell system.

He proceeded to explain that One Bell meant take your clothes off... Two Bells meant get into bed... and Three Bells meant start fooling around.

The chief came home from work one evening and decided to try out his system. First he hollered ‘One Bell’ and his wife took off her clothes. Then he hollered ‘Two Bells’ and she got into bed. Finally he hollered ‘Three Bells’ and they started fooling around like crazy.

A few minutes later the wife yells "Four Bells." "Four Bells?" the chief asks, "What the hell is Four Bells?"

"Let out more hose, You're nowhere near the fire!"