Recipe For Success

4 shots of tequila & I bang my wife doggie style.

2 makes her horny & 2 more gets her out on the front lawn.

Why do only 10 percent of men make it to heaven?

Because if they all went, it would be called hell.

What is the irritating part around a blonde's pussy?

The other guys waiting their turn!

My wife and I were having a discussion about heaven. I told her she shouldn't worry 'cause she'll never get there. She asked: "How can you say that?"

I told her: "Because dragons never fly above 8,000 feet."

And that's when the fight started...