Why are roach clips called roach clips?
Because "pot holder" was already taken.
What do you say to a man with five penises?
"Your jeans fit like a glove."
Why is a pap smear called a pap smear?
Because women wouldn't do them if they were called cunt scrapes.
Husband: "What would you like for your anniversary, Sylvia?"
Wife: "A divorce, Bernie."
Husband: "I wasn't planning on spending that much."
And that's when the fight started...
