What would you call a woman who always knows where her husband is?
A widow.
My wife was complaining I fart too much, so she ripped a big one right back at me. I asked her, "Honey, you never did that when we were dating. How come?"
She said, "'Cause I didn't get an asshole till we were married."
And that's when the fight started...
Old Dick is ambidextrous. Yep! I can swing a bat from both sides of the plate, & jerk off with both hands.
What does a Rubik's Cube and a dick have in common?
The more you play with it the harder it gets.
