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Just Plain Funny

PlainFunny400X200Not every laugh has to be a dick joke!

One Or The Other For Sure

Created: 13 June 2017
Hits: 2426

If a guy opens the car door for his wife you can be sure of 1 thing: either the car is new or the wife is.

No Place Like Home

Created: 10 June 2017
Hits: 2630

A trucker who was on the road for two weeks stops at a whore house in Atlanta. He plops down $500 bucks and tells the madame: "I want your ugliest girl and a grilled cheese sandwich."

The madamce is astonished and says: "For that kind of money you can have any of my finest ladies and a 5-course dinner."

The trucker replies: "Listen darlin'... I'm not horny - I'm homesick!"

Out The Door

Created: 08 June 2017
Hits: 2848

Two lawyers were leaving the office. "I can't wait to get home," says one. "As soon as I walk in the door I'm going to rip my wife's panties off."

"I know the feeling." his partner says.

"No, I'm serious," says the first guy. "They're killing me."

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Don't Miss These Jokes!

Where Else?

Two old folks were flirting at a senior's singles mingle. After a few drinks, the old man asks the old woman, "If I took you out for a romantic night of wining, dining and dancing, what would you wear?"

The old woman replied shyly, "Depends... ."

"Depends on what?" he asked. "On my ass -- where else?!"

Peeing In The Shower Saves Water

My girlfriend's a real clean freak. She says it's disgusting to piss in the bathtub.

Next time maybe I should wait until she gets out.

The Most Important Meal Of The Day

My wife and I were sitting at breakfast having bacon and eggs. I told her: Darling, you're just like bacon... you look, smell and taste fantastic!"

Thanks she said... before I added: "And your both killing me slowly."

And that's when the fight started...

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