Just Plain Funny
Not every laugh has to be a dick joke!
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If a guy opens the car door for his wife you can be sure of 1 thing: either the car is new or the wife is.
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A trucker who was on the road for two weeks stops at a whore house in Atlanta. He plops down $500 bucks and tells the madame: "I want your ugliest girl and a grilled cheese sandwich."
The madamce is astonished and says: "For that kind of money you can have any of my finest ladies and a 5-course dinner."
The trucker replies: "Listen darlin'... I'm not horny - I'm homesick!"
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Two lawyers were leaving the office. "I can't wait to get home," says one. "As soon as I walk in the door I'm going to rip my wife's panties off."
"I know the feeling." his partner says.
"No, I'm serious," says the first guy. "They're killing me."