A laugh a day. It's not hard. Seriously.

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Just Plain Funny

PlainFunny400X200Not every laugh has to be a dick joke!

Depends On What You Call It

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Why is a pap smear called a pap smear?

Because women wouldn't do them if they were called cunt scrapes.

Another Bingo!

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How do you get four old ladies to shout "Fuck"?

Get a fifth old lady to shout "Bingo!"

Blonde Snowman

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Why does it take longer to build a blonde snowman?

Because you have to hollow out the head.

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Don't Miss These Jokes!

Professional Opinion

Guy visits the doctor and tells him, "Doc, I've got a sex problem. I can't get it up for my wife anymore." The doctor tells him, "Bring her back with you tomorrow and let me see what I can do."

The next day, the guy comes back with his wife. The doctor tells her, "Please take off all of your clothes and lie down on the table." After she's lying there naked, the doctor walks around the table a few times, looking her up and down and all around.

Finally he pulls the guy aside and assures him, "You're fine. She don't give me a hard-on, either."

Biggest Turkey You Got

A lady was looking for a turkey but couldn't find one big enough. She asked the stock boy, "Do these turkeys get any bigger?"

The stock boy replied, "No. They're dead."

Be Careful What You Wish For

A couple comes up to a wishing well. The guy leans over, makes a wish, and throws in a penny. His wife decides to make a wish, too, but she leans over too far, falls into the well, and drowns.

The guy says, "Fuck...it works."