Depends On What You Call It

Why is a pap smear called a pap smear?

Because women wouldn't do them if they were called cunt scrapes.

How do you confuse a female archaeologist?

Give her a used tampon and ask her what period it's from.

If Gin makes you grin and Whiskey makes you frisky, what makes you pregnant?

Two highballs and a squirt.

My wife is constantly complaining that I don't listen to her...

...or something like that.