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Just Plain Funny

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You're On The Clock

Created: 17 January 2017
Hits: 2295

The Dean of Women at an exclusive girls' school was lecturing her students on sexual morality. "We live today in very difficult times. In moments of temptation ask yourself just one question: Is 15 minutes of pleasure worth a lifetime of shame?"

One young girl in the back of the room rose and asked: "Excuse me, but how do you make it last 15 minutes?"

Drive Safely

Created: 15 January 2017
Hits: 2297

A car was driving recklessly down the street, swerving left and right. When it whizzed past a cop he pulled it over. A blonde rolled down the window and said, " Officer, I'm so glad you're here. I saw a tree in the road, then I saw another. So I had to swerve to keep from hitting them!"

The officer looked at her and said, "Ma'am, that's your air freshener."

Hi. My Name is Dick

Created: 13 January 2017
Hits: 2587

I just joined a brand new 13-step treatment program. I'm still on step 1 - becoming an alcoholic.

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What has a whole bunch of little balls and screws old ladies?

Bingo night.

Advice For Parents

You don't have to vaccinate all your children.

Just the ones you want to keep.

Should Have Written A Pre-Nup

Husband: "What would you like for your anniversary, Sylvia?"

Wife: "A divorce, Bernie."

Husband: "I wasn't planning on spending that much."

And that's when the fight started...

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