I just joined a brand new 13-step treatment program. I'm still on step 1 - becoming an alcoholic.
Last Xmas Aunt Ellen hung herself.
As a traditional family, we didn't take her down until after New Year's.
My wife and I were basking in the afterglow of having sex when she asked: "Honey, why did God create orgasms?"
I said: "So women can moan even when they’re happy."
And that's when the fight started...
Why was the nearsighted fly starving?
He couldn't see shit.
