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Sounds Like My Ex-Wife

Created: 12 February 2017
Hits: 2521

What's a necrophiliac's biggest complaint about sex?

She just kinda lays there.

We Have A Runner

Created: 10 February 2017
Hits: 2796

Why did the woman cross the road?

Never mind that, what the fuck is she doing out of the kitchen?

I Hope His Prayers Are Answered

Created: 07 February 2017
Hits: 2511

A man's been praying at The Wailing Wall in Jerusalem for 20 years. One day he's being interviewed. The reporter says, "You've been praying at The Wailing Wall for 20 years?" The man says, "Absolutely, 20 years. In the morning when I get up, I pray there should be peace in the world. In the afternoon I pray that misery and hunger should be eliminated. And at night I pray that the Israelis and the Palestinians should live together in harmony."

The reporter says, "Well, those are all very nice thoughts. Tell me, how does it feel?"

The man says, "It's like talking to a fucking wall."

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Show Some Respect

My dick is so big, I have to call it Mr. Dick in front of company.

No Tricks Here

What's a sure-fire way to give a woman an orgasm?

Who cares?

Come This Way

A girl says to a salesman, "I need some batteries for my vibrator."

He motions with his finger, "Come this way..."

She says, "If I could come that way I wouldn't need a fucking vibrator."

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