Are Those Brand New Hardwood Floors?

How are women like hardwood floors?

You lay them right the first time and you can walk all over them for the next 20 years.

When I got home last night, my wife demanded that I take her someplace expensive...

...so, I took her to a gas station.

And that's when the fight started...

My wife and I had our usual back and forth at breakfast when I finally said: "You know, I was a fool when I married you."

She replied, "Yes, dear, but I was in love and didn’t notice."

And that's when the fight started...

Why are black guys dicks bigger than white guys?

Because as kids white guys had toys to play with!