My apartment is full of Valentine's cards.
I'm not some kind of stud.
I'm a lazy bastard postman.
My wife was curious. She asked: "When do married men stop jerking off?"
I told her: "When they get divorced."
And that's when the fight started...
I know that newspapers are losing out to the Internet, but think about it... how many newspapers can a woman hold between her legs?
Easy! One Post, two Globes, and many Times. And I wouldn't mind a morning and an evening edition. Yeah... I like a woman who's into the hard news.
OK... I'm done.
Barking dog at the back door wanting in and your wife's yelling at the front wanting in. Which one do you let in?
The dog, once he's in, he shuts up!
