D*ck Joke of the Day
A laugh a day. It's not hard. Seriously.
  • Home
  • Dick Jokes
  • Just Plain Funny
  • That's when the fight started
  • WTF?!
  • About
  • Send Dick A Joke

twitter facebook youtube 27330664 ml50x52

  1. You are here:  
  2. Home
  3. Every Frickin' Joke

Every Frickin' Joke

One Day At The Vet's

Category: Just Plain Funny
Published: 28 June 2017
Hits: 2034

Three Labrador retrievers - chocolate, yellow, and black - are in the waiting room at the vet's office when they strike up a conversation.

The black lab turns to the chocolate and says, "So why are you here?" The chocolate lab replies, "I'm a pisser. I piss on everything – the sofa, the drapes, the cat, the kids. But the final straw was last night, when I pissed in the middle of my owner's bed." The black lab says, "So what is the vet going to do?" "Gonna give me Prozac," came the reply from the chocolate lab. "All the vets are prescribing it. It works for everything."

The black lab then turns to the yellow lab and asks, "Why are you here?" The yellow lab says, "I'm a digger. I dig under fences, dig up flowers and trees, I dig just for the hell of it. When I'm inside, I dig up the carpets. But I went over
the line last night when I dug a great big hole in my owner's couch." "So what are they going to do to you?" the black lab inquired. "Looks like Prozac for me too," the dejected yellow lab said.

Then the yellow lab turns to the black lab and asks what he's at the vet's office for. "I'm a humper," the black lab says. "I'll hump anything. I'll hump the cat, a pillow, the table, fire hydrants, whatever. I want to hump everything I see. Yesterday, my owner had just gotten out of the shower and was bending over to dry her toes, and I just couldn't help myself I hopped on her back and started humping away."

The yellow and chocolate labs exchange a sad glance and say, "So, Prozac for you too, huh?"

The black lab says, ‘Nah... just here to get my nails clipped."

Ladies and Gentleman We Have A Winner

Category: Dick Jokes
Published: 28 June 2017
Hits: 2065

My dick is so big, I entered it in a big-dick contest and it came in first, second and third.

I Prefer Natural Remedies

Category: Just Plain Funny
Published: 27 June 2017
Hits: 2010

A guy gets a prescription from his doctor for Viagra with the instruction to take it one hour before sex.

He gets home, checks his watch and looking for a little action he pops a pill an hour before his wife is due home from work.

But just as he was expecting her, she phoned to say that she would be home late while she ran some errands.

In a panic, he phoned the doctor. "What should I do?" he asked. "I've taken the pill but the effects will wear off by the time my wife gets home."

"I see," said the doctor. "It is a shame to waste it. Do you have a maid?" "Yes." "Well, you could occupy yourself with her instead?"

"But I don't need Viagra with the maid."

This Is What I Call It

Category: Dick Jokes
Published: 26 June 2017
Hits: 2158

If nuts on a wall are walnuts and nuts on a chest are chestnuts, what are nuts on a chin?

A blowjob.

Page 25 of 286

  • 20
  • 21
  • 22
  • 23
  • 24
  • 25
  • 26
  • 27
  • 28
  • 29

Don't Miss These Jokes!

Ding Dong

The bell rings at a whorehouse.

The madam answers the door and finds a guy with no arms and no legs. She looks at him and says: "What'ya think you're gonna do in here?"

He says: "Hey... I rang the bell, didn't I?"

They Do Look The Same

This lady is shopping in a supermarket when she notices a handsome muscular boy doing the bagging at one of the checkouts. Making sure she goes through his line, she leans over and asks if he'll carry her groceries out, to which he responds, "Sure lady."

They no sooner get out of the store when she again leans over and whispers, "You know, I have an itchy pussy."

The young man responds, "You'll have to point it out lady, all those Japanese cars look alike to me!"

Turned That List Into a Rap Sheet

Why did Santa get arrested?

He got caught laying Barbie under the Christmas tree!

Copyright © 2025 D*ck Joke Of The Day. All Rights Reserved.