Every Frickin' Joke

Back On My ... Back

: Category: Dick Jokes; Published: 02 October 2015; Hits: 3570

Broke hooker to girlfriend while walking the streets together: "Lend me 10 bucks till I'm on my back again"

Sperm Banks or Blood Banks?

: Category: Dick Jokes; Published: 01 October 2015; Hits: 3140

A recent survey shows that sperm banks beat blood banks in contributions... HANDS DOWN!

Liar Liar, Pants On Fire!

: Category: Dick Jokes; Published: 30 September 2015; Hits: 3028

What do you call a teenager who doesn't masturbate?

A liar.

Better Than Lifting Weights

: Category: And that's when the fight started...; Published: 29 September 2015; Hits: 2957

My wife and I love to work out. This morning at the gym we had a discussion. She asked me: "What do you think is the most active muscle in a woman?"

I told her: "My dick."

And that's when the fight started...

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Wait For It

Polar bear walks into a bar, asks for a gin...
.
.
.
.
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and tonic.

Bartender asks: "Why the long pause?"

Open Wide

A guy walks into a bar with an alligator. It's about 10 feet long. The bartender flips out and says, "Hey buddy, you gotta get that son of a bitch outta here. It's going to bite one of my customers and I'm going to get sued." The guy says, "No no no, it's a tame alligator. I'll prove it to you."

He picks up the alligator and puts it on the bar. Then he unzips his pants, pulls out his package and sticks it in the alligator's mouth. The alligator just keeps his mouth open. After about 5 minutes, he pulls it out of the alligator's mouth and zips up his pants and says, "See, I told you it was a tame alligator. Anybody else want to try it?"

The drunk down at the end of the bar says, "Yeah, I'd like to try it but I don't think I can hold my mouth open that long!"

Not the Same Old Routine

My wife wanted to be a little playful, so she whispered: "Say dirty things to me!"

So I said: "Bathroom, kitchen, living room..."

And that's when the fight started...