Every Frickin' Joke

Back On My ... Back

: Category: Dick Jokes; Published: 02 October 2015; Hits: 3482

Broke hooker to girlfriend while walking the streets together: "Lend me 10 bucks till I'm on my back again"

Sperm Banks or Blood Banks?

: Category: Dick Jokes; Published: 01 October 2015; Hits: 2996

A recent survey shows that sperm banks beat blood banks in contributions... HANDS DOWN!

Liar Liar, Pants On Fire!

: Category: Dick Jokes; Published: 30 September 2015; Hits: 2923

What do you call a teenager who doesn't masturbate?

A liar.

Better Than Lifting Weights

: Category: And that's when the fight started...; Published: 29 September 2015; Hits: 2844

My wife and I love to work out. This morning at the gym we had a discussion. She asked me: "What do you think is the most active muscle in a woman?"

I told her: "My dick."

And that's when the fight started...

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Real National Pastime

Any man who thinks baseball is our national pastime never played doctor when he was a kid!

One Day At The Vet's

Three Labrador retrievers - chocolate, yellow, and black - are in the waiting room at the vet's office when they strike up a conversation.

The black lab turns to the chocolate and says, "So why are you here?" The chocolate lab replies, "I'm a pisser. I piss on everything – the sofa, the drapes, the cat, the kids. But the final straw was last night, when I pissed in the middle of my owner's bed." The black lab says, "So what is the vet going to do?" "Gonna give me Prozac," came the reply from the chocolate lab. "All the vets are prescribing it. It works for everything."

The black lab then turns to the yellow lab and asks, "Why are you here?" The yellow lab says, "I'm a digger. I dig under fences, dig up flowers and trees, I dig just for the hell of it. When I'm inside, I dig up the carpets. But I went over
the line last night when I dug a great big hole in my owner's couch." "So what are they going to do to you?" the black lab inquired. "Looks like Prozac for me too," the dejected yellow lab said.

Then the yellow lab turns to the black lab and asks what he's at the vet's office for. "I'm a humper," the black lab says. "I'll hump anything. I'll hump the cat, a pillow, the table, fire hydrants, whatever. I want to hump everything I see. Yesterday, my owner had just gotten out of the shower and was bending over to dry her toes, and I just couldn't help myself I hopped on her back and started humping away."

The yellow and chocolate labs exchange a sad glance and say, "So, Prozac for you too, huh?"

The black lab says, ‘Nah... just here to get my nails clipped."

The Voice of Experience

Husband asks: "Should I watch porn or hockey?"

Wife: "Watch porn. You already know how to play hockey."

And that's when the fight started...