A laugh a day. It's not hard. Seriously.

twitter facebook youtube 27330664 ml50x52

Every Frickin' Joke

Don't Forget to Eat Your Veggies

Category: Dick Jokes
Hits: 3159

What's the hardest part about eating a vegetable?

Putting her back in the wheelchair when you're done.

(Hope that one wasn't too bad!)

Ripped from the Headlines

Category: Dick Jokes
Hits: 3182

So I was reading the paper the other day when I caught the headline: "Sex no more strenuous than golf, expert says"

What would we do without experts? But yeah... true... and for some guys sex is harder to get it in the hole!

Brand New Dishwasher

Category: Dick Jokes
Hits: 2919

What's the first thing a man would do if there were no women left on earth?

Invent a dishwasher that would suck his dick.

Brrrrrrrrrr

Category: And that's when the fight started...
Hits: 3230

Last winter my wife and I were walking down the street when we passed a fancy department store window. She turned and asked me: "Sweetheart, why won't you buy me a fur coat? I'm so cold!"

I told her: "If you already knew the answer, why'd you bother asking?"

And that's when the fight started...

Page 185 of 286

Don't Miss These Jokes!

Why I Really Married You

Jack and his wife lived in Arizona where the summers are very hot. One day they awoke to a particularly severe heat wave. As he stepped out of the shower he complained to his wife saying, “it’s just too hot to wear any clothes on a day like this. What would the neighbors think if I mowed the lawn with no clothes.”

“That I only married you for your money.”

And that's when the fight started...

No Fairy Tale

Little Red Riding Hood went to grandma's house and found her lying in bed. Little Red Riding Hood said, ''Grandma, what big eyes you have!'' Grandma replied: ''The better to see you with, my dear.'' Then Little Red Riding Hood remarked: ''Grandma, what big ears you have!'' Grandma smiled and said: "The better to hear you with, my dear.''

Finally Little Red Riding Hood said: ''Grandma, what a big mouth you have!'' Grandma snapped back: ''Of course I do! Have you seen Grandpa's dick?!?''

Not What You Think

The mother of a 17-year-old girl was concerned that her daughter was having sex... Worried the girl might become pregnant and adversely impact family, she consulted the family doctor.

The doctor told her that teenagers today were very willful and any attempt to stop the girl would probably result in rebellion. He then told her to arrange for her daughter to be put on birth control and until then talk to her and give her a box of condoms.

Later that evening, as her daughter was preparing for a date, the mother told her about the situation and handed her a box of condoms.

The girl burst out laughing and reached over to hug her mother, saying, "Oh Mom! You don't have to worry about that! I'm dating Susan!"