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How'd He Do It?!

Category: Just Plain Funny
Published: 19 April 2016
Hits: 3222

A man went to the police station looking for a chance to question the burglar who had broken into his house the night before.

“You’ll get your chance in court.” said the Desk Sargent.

“No, no no!” said the man. “I want to know how he got into the house without waking my wife. I’ve been trying to do that for years!”

Good Riddance

Category: Just Plain Funny
Published: 18 April 2016
Hits: 3068

Two guys were out fishing on the lake when a hearse and funeral procession passed the boat on a nearby road. One of them stood up and held his fishing hat over his heart as the hearse passed.

His buddy commented, "Gee, Harry, that was really nice and respectful!"

To which Harry replied, "Well, after all we were married for 40 years."

Beautiful Women

Category: Just Plain Funny
Published: 17 April 2016
Hits: 2831

A man approaches a very beautiful woman in a large supermarket and asks, “You know, I’ve lost my wife here in the supermarket. Can you talk to me for a couple of minutes?”

“Why?” the woman asks.

“Because every time I talk to a beautiful woman my wife appears out of nowhere.”

Too Soon

Category: Dick Jokes
Published: 16 April 2016
Hits: 3036

Why is sleeping with a man like a soap opera?

Just when it's getting interesting, they're finished until next time.

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Don't Miss These Jokes!

Not So Difficult After All

Lifehack: How do you find a needle in a haystack?

Easy... burn the fuckin' hay! Any more questions?

Top 10 Reasons Thanksgiving Dinner Is Better Than Sex

10. You're sure to get at least one of your favorite dishes.

9. The turkey never suffers from modesty.

8. You can nibble before dinner even if mom sees you.

7. You are expected to pass the dishes around.

6. There are always at least two kinds of desert, with or without whipped cream.

5. They give you the day off WITH pay to have dinner.

4. Thanksgiving dinner is a "sure" thing.

3. Seconds are encouraged. Take home, too!!

2. You're expected to fall asleep after dinner.

And the number 1 reason why Thanksgiving dinner is better than sex:

1. You are EXPECTED to watch football BEFORE and AFTER dinner.

Three's A Crowd

Bad things come in three's. Always in three's.

The other day I was screwing my girlfriend while her husband was on a business trip. First she said three words: "Is it in?"

Then she followed that with: "Are you done?"

And finally I heard the front door open and a man's voice shout out: "Honey, I'm home!"

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