Every Frickin' Joke

What Is This, A Joke?

: Category: Dick Jokes; Published: 11 April 2016; Hits: 2961

A Jew, a Catholic and a Mormon were having drinks at the bar after an interfaith convention.

The Jew, bragging about his virility said, "I have four sons, one more and I’ll have a basketball team!"

The Catholic pooh-poohed this accomplishment, stating, "That’s nothing, I have 10 sons, one more and I’ll have a football team."

To which the Mormon replied, "You guys don't have a clue. I have 17 wives, one more and I’ll have a golf course!"

I Always Wonder Why

: Category: And that's when the fight started...; Published: 10 April 2016; Hits: 2740

It was our anniversary and I was reminiscing with my wife. She asked if I could remember way back when.

I told her: "You know honey, I can remember where we got married and I can remember when we got married... I just can’t remember why."

And that's when the fight started.

Something Magical

: Category: Dick Jokes; Published: 09 April 2016; Hits: 3790

I was in bed with this chick last night. She turned to me and whispered in a low, sexy voice: "I want tonight to be magical"

So I fucked her and disappeared.

Lots Of Scarifies in Life

: Category: And that's when the fight started...; Published: 08 April 2016; Hits: 2893

I told my wife I was so pleased she treated me like a God. She looked at me and asked, "What do you mean?"

I told her, "Every evening at dinner you give me a burnt offering."

And that's when the fight started...

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Black Listed

Three couples, one older, one middle-aged and one newlywed want to join a church club. So they go down to the church to meet with the pastor who is responsible for screening couples before they join. After the pastor tells them about all the benefits of joining, he explains that in order to qualify, they must refrain from having sex for one month. If they fail they would not be approved for membership. The three couples each agree and head on home.

A month later, the three couples return and and sit down again with the pastor. He asks the older couple if they had abstained from having sex. The older couple replied, "Oh yeah, no problem." and they are allowed to join.

Next the middle-aged couple were asked the same question and their reply was the same. So they too were approved for membership.

Finally the pastor asked the newlyweds the same question and the husband responded: "Well, it went great for a couple of weeks. But one day my wife was reaching for a can of corn on a shelf and she dropped it. When she bent over to pick it up, I was overcome with lust and I just couldn't stand it. That's when I said the hell with it and screwed her right there."

The pastor was shocked but said: "You realize that now you won't be allowed into the club."

The husband replied: "Oh that's okay, we're not allowed back into Safeway either!"

Going Down?

I think I got beat up pretty bad last night. I remember getting on the elevator at my office and running into this gorgeous secretary with big tits. I couldn't help staring at her while the elevator door closed, but didn't start up. She said: "Would you please press one?"

So I did. I don't remember much after that...

What Did Your Momma Give You?

Why are black guys dicks bigger than white guys?

Because as kids white guys had toys to play with!