What's the definition of trust?
Two gay cannibals giving each other a blowjob.
A Chinese guy calls his boss and says: "Me sick... Can`t come to work today." The Boss says: "No problem. When I'm sick, I fuck my wife... try that!"
Two hours later the Chinese guy rings back and says: "Me better now... you got a nice house!"
The day before Valentine's day I was looking for the perfect card for my wife when I saw something strange.
On the front of one of the cards it said, "I love you and only you."
By itself it may not sound strange, but this was a package of 20 cards.
What do you call hooker that likes it in the ass?
A crack whore.