Every Frickin' Joke
Just Beat It
- Category: Dick Jokes
- Hits: 2866
What's the difference between meat and chicken?
If you beat your chicken, it dies.
Switcheroo
- Category: Dick Jokes
- Hits: 3347
A man went into a local bar and took a seat next to a pretty woman. He turned to her and said, "This is a special day, I’m celebrating." "What a coincidence," said the woman, "I’m celebrating, too". She clinked glasses with him and asked, "What are you celebrating?" "I’m a chicken farmer," he replied. "For years all my hens were infertile, but today they’re finally fertile." "What a coincidence" the woman said. "My husband and I have been trying to have a child for years. Today, my gynecologist told me I’m finally pregnant!" And she clinked glasses with the farmer again.
"By the way" she asked, "How did your chickens become fertile?" "I switched cocks," the farmer replied.
To which the woman smiled and said, "What a coincidence."
Not A Lifesaver
- Category: Just Plain Funny
- Hits: 2785
A teacher was working with a group of underprivileged children, trying to broaden their horizons through sensory exploration. With their eyes closed, they would feel all types of objects, smell aromatic herbs and exotic fruits. Then one day, the teacher brought in a great variety of candy lifesavers, more flavors than you could ever imagine.
"Children, I’d like you to close your eyes and taste these," announced the teacher. Without difficulty, they managed to identify the taste of cherries, lemons and mint, but when the teacher had them put honey flavored lifesavers in their mouths, every one of the children was stumped. "I’ll give you a hint," said the teacher. "It’s something your Mommy probably calls your Daddy all the time."
Instantly, Little Johnny spat the lifesaver out of his mouth and shouted, "Spit ’em out, you guys, they’re assholes!"
He Knows The Score
- Category: Dick Jokes
- Hits: 3121
A wife went on a retreat for work. When she returned home, she found a pair of panties in her dresser that did not belong to her. Furious, she questioned her husband. The husband said, "I have no idea where they came from I don't do the laundry!" So, the wife went to the maid and questioned her.
Indignant, the maid replied, "Madam, how should I know? These panties don't belong to me. I don't even wear panties... just ask your husband!"
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