Every Frickin' Joke
How To Score
- Category: Dick Jokes
- Hits: 2895
A guy takes a girl out to dinner for their 1st date. She orders shrimp cocktail, filet mignon - medium rare, a loaded baked potato, the vegetable medley, and crème brulee' for desert. Then before the waiter leaves she adds a bottle of expensive wine.
The guy looks at her and says, "Does your mother feed you like that?"
She says, "No... but my mother's not looking to fuck me."
Come Early For The Sale
- Category: Just Plain Funny
- Hits: 2731
Nacho comes before a judge. The judge asks: "Why're you here?" Nacho tells him: "I'm accused of starting my Xmas shopping early."
The judge says, "That's not a crime. How early did you start?"
Nacho says, "Before the store opened."
We Do It Every Year
- Category: Just Plain Funny
- Hits: 2823
Last Xmas Aunt Ellen hung herself.
As a traditional family, we didn't take her down until after New Year's.
Can You Even Say This Anymore?
- Category: Just Plain Funny
- Hits: 2749
What's even better than winning a gold medal at the Special Olympics?
Not being a retard.
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