A laugh a day. It's not hard. Seriously.

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Every Frickin' Joke

Save A Trip To The Pet Shop

Category: And that's when the fight started...
Hits: 2457

I asked my wife if we should get a pet for around the house.

She said she already has all the pets she needs: A mink in the closet, a jaguar in the garage, a tiger in bed, and a jackass to pay for everything.

And that's when the fight started...

One Day Down At The Head Shop

Category: Just Plain Funny
Hits: 2398

Why are roach clips called roach clips?

Because "pot holder" was already taken.

Not What She Was Hoping For

Category: Dick Jokes
Hits: 2620

What does a Polish girl get on her wedding night that is long and hard?

A new last name.

Turn The Whole Thing Around

Category: Just Plain Funny
Hits: 2494

Why are all dumb blonde jokes one liners?

So men can understand them.

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Don't Miss These Jokes!

Shove It!

What can a goose do, a duck can't, and your lawyer should?

Stick his bill up his ass.

Mother-In-Law's Gift

Last year, I bought my mother-in-law a cemetery plot as a Christmas gift.

This year I didn't buy her anything..

When my wife asked me why I didn't buy her mother a gift this year I told her "Hey, she never used the gift I bought her last year!"

And that's when the fight started...

Why A Guy Hates Valentines Day

Valentines day is just a massive hassle:

1. Remember to text my girlfriend a big lovey dovey message at the start of the day.
2. Remember to buy her a card in my lunch break.
3. Buy her some more crap in the rush hour after work before I meet her.
4. Take her to a fancy restaurant and pay for a pointlessly expensive meal.
5. Take her back to her place and give her some gentle, passionate love when all I want to do is excessively bang her.

And I have to do all this, then drive home without my wife finding out!