What does a Polish girl get on her wedding night that is long and hard?
A new last name.
I told my pal: "I got a brand new digital hearing aid, $10,000!" "What kind is it?" he asked.
Why did the snowman have a smile on his face?
Because the snowblower was coming down the block.
Old Dick is always willing to help a guy score with a great pickup line. Here's one you can try:
"I'd like to point out that 'beautiful' has 'u' in it. But, 'quickie' has u & i together."