Three nuns and a priest are stranded in the desert. Luckily, they come across a camel. So they all jump on and head off to find help. After a while the camel is totally exhausted and falls down dead.
The priest says " Well sisters, this looks like the end. Do any of you have any last request?"
The first nun says "Father I have never had sex before." So the priest thinking this is their last day on earth, says OK and has sex with her.
The second nun says " I too father have never had sex before." So the priest thinks well, why not, and has sex with her too.
The priest then asked the third nun if her request is the same. She says "Not exactly father. I would just like to know what is that between your legs."
The priest says "Sister, that is a penis. It was put there by god to give the gift of life."
The last nun then responds "Great! Stick it in the camel and let's get the fuck out of here."
Johnson's wife had been in a coma for four months. The nurses came to realise that she would move a little every time they washed her crotch area. Her doctor thought hard about this and asked Johnson to come to the hospital.
When he got there the doctor suggested perhaps if Johnson practiced oral sex with her she might wake out of the coma. Johnson said he would try anything and asked for some privacy.
Minutes later he came rushing out of the room shouting, "Doc, help, I think she's choking!"