Why can't Barbie get pregnant?
Because Ken comes in a different box.
How do you circumcise a hillbilly?
Kick his sister in the jaw.
How did Pinocchio find out he was made out of wood?
His hand caught fire.
My wife smiled at breakfast this morning and said: "Today is our anniversary darling... what should we do?"
I told her: "Stand in silence for 2 minutes."
And that;s when the fight started...