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Dick Jokes

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The Dick Joke
High art... from a low place.

Get Your Nails Done Too

Hits: 2715

I love dating manicurists and hair stylists.

One does hand jobs, the other does blow jobs!

Have You Upgraded To 4K?

Hits: 2933

At a party the other night I was asked how I view lesbian relationships.

Apparently "In HD" was not the best answer.

Things Have Gone Too Far

Hits: 3413

What is more messed up than fingering your sister?

Pulling your finger out and finding your dad's wedding ring.

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Go Both Ways

Old Dick is ambidextrous. Yep! I can swing a bat from both sides of the plate, & jerk off with both hands.

Pray For Me

Willie goes to a revival meeting for some much needed prayer. The preacher says, "Whoever needs to be healed-UH... come for-ward-UH... come to the al-tar-UH... ask for the heal-ing-UH..." Willie gets in line, and when it's his turn, the preacher says, "All right my son, what do you need me to pray for?" Willie says, "Preacher, I need you to pray for my hearing."

The preacher puts one hand over Willie's ear, puts the other hand on top of Willie's head, and prays and prays and prays. After a few minutes, the preacher takes his hands away, stands back, and says, "Son, how is your hearing now?"

Willie says, "I don't know preacher. My hearing ain't 'til next Wednesday."

In The Classroom

The teacher asked the class: "What's the capital of Wisconsin?"

The blonde raised her hand and answered: "W"