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Dick Jokes

DJoke400X311

The Dick Joke
High art... from a low place.

Soon Enough Young Man

Hits: 2848

Little Johnny in the bathtub points at his dick: "Mommy, is my brain in there?"

"Not yet, sweetie."

Recipe For Success

Hits: 2710

4 shots of tequila & I bang my wife doggie style.

2 makes her horny & 2 more gets her out on the front lawn.

You Know You've Done It

Hits: 2566

Women are like parking spots. With all the good ones taken & nobody looking, you stick it in a disabled one.

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Don't Miss These Jokes!

Street Accounting

Little Johnny is always being teased by the neighborhood toughs for being stupid. Their favorite joke is to offer Johnny his choice between a nickel and a dime. Little Johnny always takes the nickel, causing no amount of snickering and glee among the bullies.

One day, after Johnny takes the nickel, nice Mr. Johnson pulls him aside and says, "Johnny, those boys are making fun of you. Don't you know that a dime is worth more than a nickel, even though the nickel is bigger?"

Johnny grins and says, "Well, if I took the dime, they'd probably stop. Right now I'm up more than twenty bucks on those mooks!"

Just Like Your Father

The bride, upon her engagement, went to her mother and said, "I've found a man just like father!"

Her mother replied, "So what do you want from me, sympathy?"

Wife Tests Husband's Love

My wife wanted to test me. So she asked: "Honey, what would you do if you came home and caught me in bed with another guy."

I told her: "I'd kick his seeing eye dog."

And that's when the fight started...