A laugh a day. It's not hard. Seriously.

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WTF?!

WTF?!

Sometimes life can be stranger than even some of our very own dick jokes. And in times like that all we can say is: "What the fuck?!" All these stories are true... they happened to real people. And we didn't even change the names. They deserve the recognition!

Woman arrested for calling 911 about bad Chinese food

Hits: 3096

WTF?! A woman was arrested for calling 911 to report bad Chinese food. C'mon. Is there any other kind? A 44-year-old Ohio woman was brought to jail after calling 911 to report Chinese food that was "not up to par for her liking," according to police.

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Fake penis trial: Gayle Newland jailed for eight years

Hits: 3186

#WTF?! Gayle Newland, who tricked her female friend into sex using a fake penis, was sentenced to jail for eight years. One year for every inch of that fake Johnson... but who's counting.

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Don't Miss These Jokes!

Whore House

What's more profitable, a 1-story whore house or a 2-story whore house?

A 1-story... no fucking overhead.

Salesman Of The Month

Guy goes to a cocktail party but doesn't realize his fly is open.

At the party he spots a real pretty gal across the room and decides to try his luck. He walks up and they start chatting when the gal glances down and sees his open fly. Hoping to be discreet she casually asks: "Did you lock up your business before you got here tonight?" The guy says, "Sure."

After a few more minutes of small talk the gal tries again: "Are you sure the store is locked up?" The guy says, "Absolutely..." still not realizing what she meant.

As he walks away a few minutes later he realizes his fly is open and fixes the problem. Later that evening he spots the gal again, only this time he is prepared. He walks up behind her and taps her on the shoulder. As she turns around he smiles at her and asks: "Remember earlier when you noticed my store was open? Tell me... was my best salesman in or out?"

Who Took My Pen!

A nurse walks in and says, "Doc, what are you doing?"

He says, "I'm writing a prescription."

She says, "But you're holding your thermometer."

He says, "Jesus Christ, some asshole has my pen."