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WTF?!

Sometimes life can be stranger than even some of our very own dick jokes. And in times like that all we can say is: "What the fuck?!" All these stories are true... they happened to real people. And we didn't even change the names. They deserve the recognition!

Eww! Student arrested after video shows her allegedly spitting, spraying Windex in roommates’ food

Created: 07 May 2015
Hits: 9746

#WTF?! How not to share the cleaning duties - spitting and spraying windex on her roommate's food. A University of South Carolina student was arrested and charged with a felony after police say she was caught on video spitting and spraying the glass cleaner in food containers. Yuch.

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Fake penis trial: Gayle Newland jailed for eight years

Created: 15 November 2015
Hits: 3217

#WTF?! Gayle Newland, who tricked her female friend into sex using a fake penis, was sentenced to jail for eight years. One year for every inch of that fake Johnson... but who's counting.

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Don't Miss These Jokes!

A Man's Man

What would you call a guy who jerks off during an earthquake?

Focused.

No Advice Needed

Little Johnny was on a park bench stuffing all of his Halloween candy in his mouth. An old lady walked up, saying: "Son, don't you know that eating all of that candy will rot your teeth, give you acne, and make you sick?"

"My grandfather lived to be 105 years old!" replied Johnny.

"Did he eat five candy bars at a sitting?" the old lady retorted.

"No," said Johnny, "but he minded his own freakin' business."

Roll Call

Every morning the teacher took roll call by having her students stand up and recite a short poem. The first to go sat in the front row and was the teacher's pet. He stood and said, "My name is Dan. When I grow up to be a man, I want to go to Japan... if I can, and I think I can."

Next up was a little girl who sat in the middle of the room. She stood and answered roll call by reciting, "My name is Suzy. When I become a lady, I would like to have a baby... if I can, and I think I can."

Finally it was Little Johnny's turn, a wise guy who sat way in the back of the room. He stood up and said, "My name is Johnny, and I don't give a crap about Japan. But I'd sure like to help Suzy with her plan... if I can, and you bet your sweet ass I can!"

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