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Sometimes life can be stranger than even some of our very own dick jokes. And in times like that all we can say is: "What the fuck?!" All these stories are true... they happened to real people. And we didn't even change the names. They deserve the recognition!

Mr. Toot Gets Busted For Cocaine Possession

Created: 02 March 2017
Hits: 3067

#WTF?! Florida cops arrested a Mr. Toot for cocaine possession1]. Kinda like a hooker named blowjob. What a hoot! And the guy has got a rap sheet as long as his nose. And his getaway vehicle? A Schwinn! They don't get much dumber than this guy... check it out!

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Florida Man Blames His Arrest On Faulty Legal Advice From Wikipedia

Created: 29 March 2017
Hits: 3086

WTF?! You have the right to look up idiot online, but that's all! Wikipedia is not Perry Mason. En route to jail following his arrest for driving with a suspended license and no insurance, a Florida man declared, “That’s the last time I listen to Wikipedia about driving. It said I would just get a ticket.” Actually that would be a dunce cap!

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Don't Miss These Jokes!

May I Ask Who's Calling

A man calls the doctor and is frantic, "My wife is pregnant, and her contractions are only two minutes apart!"

"Is this her first child?" the doctor asks.

"No, you idiot!" the man shouts. "This is her husband!"

What's The Dress Code

Why do blondes wear underwear?

To keep their ankles warm.

Been There Done That

A guy asks his drinkin' buddy if he had any suggestions on how to spice up a dull marriage. His buddy tells him "Well, you can always have an affair."

"I can't possibly do that! I would never cheat on her." he replies. So his buddy tells him "Look, if you convince her to let you do it, it won't be cheating." The guy thinks sure, that could work. And so he heads home, and finding his wife in the perfect mood, he springs the idea on her that maybe a new partner would add some excitement.

"Honey," his wife says, "that won't help our marriage. Believe me, I already tried it."

 

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