A laugh a day. It's not hard. Seriously.

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Just Plain Funny

PlainFunny400X200Not every laugh has to be a dick joke!

A Musician

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What do you call a musician with no girlfriend?

Homeless.

Flag At Half Staff

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What does it mean when they fly the flag at half staff at the post office.

They're hiring.

What's Cookin'

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What do lesbians cook for dinner?

They don't cook... they eat out.

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Don't Miss These Jokes!

Like A Bird

One night, an 87-year-old woman came home from Bingo to find her 92-year-old husband in bed with another woman. She became violent and ended up pushing him off the balcony of their 20th floor apartment, killing him instantly. Brought before the court on the charge of murder, she was asked if she had anything to say in her own defense.

"Your Honor," she began coolly, "I figured that at 92, if he could screw, he could fly."

A Man's Man

What would you call a guy who jerks off during an earthquake?

Focused.

Going Big? Go Home!

My wife sidled up to me last night and asked: "Would you like a little pussy?"

I said: "I sure would, 'cause yours is as big as a house!"

And that's when the fight started...