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Just Plain Funny

PlainFunny400X200Not every laugh has to be a dick joke!

Baby Polar Bear

Created: 31 October 2014
Hits: 2914

A baby polar bear goes to his mama and asks: "Am I a real polar bear?"

His mama assures him: "Of course you are. You're my son and we live in the north pole."

Then the baby bear goes to his father and asks: "Dad, am I a real polar bear?"

His dad tells him: "Yes you are son. You have big paws and you're white just like me. Why do you ask?"

"Cause I'm fuckin' freezing."

Paralysis Comes Easy

Created: 29 October 2014
Hits: 2706

How do you paralyze a woman from the waist down?

Marry her.

Adoption Laws

Created: 26 October 2014
Hits: 2516

Why can't lesbians adopt a child?

Because they don't serve minors to lickers.

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Don't Miss These Jokes!

Gay Sperm ... ummm .. ewwww

What did one gay sperm say to the other gay sperm?

I can't see a thing with all this shit in here!

No Advice Needed

Little Johnny was on a park bench stuffing all of his Halloween candy in his mouth. An old lady walked up, saying: "Son, don't you know that eating all of that candy will rot your teeth, give you acne, and make you sick?"

"My grandfather lived to be 105 years old!" replied Johnny.

"Did he eat five candy bars at a sitting?" the old lady retorted.

"No," said Johnny, "but he minded his own freakin' business."

Ahhh... The Things That Lovers Text To Each Other

Girl texts: "If you're sleeping, send your dreams ... if you're laughing, send your smile."

Boyfriend texts back: "Taking a shit... Please advise."

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