How do you make your girlfriend scream while having sex?
Call her and tell her.
How does one explain the miracle of Hanukkah to todays generation?
Tell them that it's like if they charged their smartphone to last for 1 day, but it ended up lasting 8 days!
What's the difference between a penis and a bonus?
Your wife will always blow your bonus!
Polar bear walks into a bar, asks for a gin........and tonic. Bartender asks: "Why the long pause?"
